Filed under: Microsoft Xbox 360

Friends, I have seen the future and it is not so bleak after all. It is a world that Max Brooks and Sam Raimi have prepared me for, but neither could anticipate the sheer awesome power of the paddle saw: two chainsaws tied to both ends of a paddle. The goal of our Dead Rising 2 demo at X10 was simple: 20,000 pp in 10 minutes. My friends, I've failed you, but it was not for lack of trying and it certainly was not without its grandiose moments.

Vaunted science magazine Popular Science got to check out Project Natal at CES, and has posted its own take on the project over on its site. While most of the coverage we've seen of Microsoft's motion controller has been from the gaming press, Pop Sci comes at it from a software engineering perspective. Essentially, Microsoft is trying to build a sophisticated AI that can look at video of what you're doing in front of a camera, and translate that to information the game can use.

To accomplish that, the coders behind Natal took lots and lots of reference pictures and videos, and they're still "teaching" the software what it looks like when you try to hit a soccer ball or wave at Milo. It's fascinating stuff -- thirty "guesses" per second at your body's location and movement based on what the computer "knows" about what bodies look like and how they move, and lots of calculations based on that data. Hopefully by the time it's supposed to release later this year, Natal will have figured out what it looks like when we melee with a battle rifle.

[Thanks, Wonderflex!]

We've heard from a few non-Microsoft sources that the Xbox 360 is heading for an extremely long console cycle, but last week's CES found Microsoft saying exactly that. David Hufford of Xbox product management mentioned during a briefing that the 360 is "the console of the long future for us," and that he doesn't yet know "if we're at the midpoint" of the console's timeline. Which sounds pretty amazing, since the console actually released in 2005, but the numbers support that theory, with adoption only recently passing the rates of the last generation.

In other words, the mad dash from 8- to 16- to 32- to 64-bit and beyond gaming has apparently relaxed for the moment, and Jack Schofield of The Guardian says it's because all three major companies at the moment (Microsoft, Sony and Nintendo) have all achieved a viable place in the market. Without feeling constant pressure to outdo each other, the major console companies can settle into their own niches and expand their own markets. Which, as Hufford said at CES, is exactly what Microsoft is planning to do in the coming "Natal era."

Terror. Is. Reality. Don't believe us? Check out the new trailer, which we just witnessed (and caught on camera) at Capcom's Dead Rising 2 event in Tokyo. You don't want to miss Keiji Inafune's posh yellow jacket as he introduces the clip.

The event is a junket unlike any other at Tokyo Game Show this year. Capcom (with the help of Microsoft) took over a restaurant/bar in Ebisu, promising free food and drinks to all attendees -- with the promise of a two-of-a-kind yellow jacket at stake for the person who wins tonight's Dead Rising 2 mutliplayer tournament.

Yeah, multiplayer. Long hinted at, we finally had a chance to play the game's competitive multiplayer mode. It certainly wasn't what we were expecting. You take control of one of four participants in a zombie-ridden game show called "Terror Is Reality." Players will compete in four different minigames, each of which takes a different spin on Dead Rising's zombie-smashing gameplay.

Activision finally got around to confirming Guitar Hero: Van Halen in May and, while our question regarding which singer will be featured in the game has been answered, the featured tracks and release date have been a mystery ... until now! MTV Multiplayer managed to get the info straight from Activision and, if you're a Van Halen fan, we're fairly certain you won't be disappointed with the selections. Essential tracks like "Jump" and "Ain't Talkin' Bout Love" have made the cut, along with a few of Eddie's scorching solos. In keeping with the Guitar Hero spin-off tradition, there will also be some music from bands other than Van Halen in the game, so head past the break for the full list of finger-bleeding tunes.

Additionally, Guitar Hero: Van Halen has been dated for release on December 22.

The Left 4 Dead 2 announcement at the Microsoft press conference gobsmacked us this morning (didn't they just release Left 4 Dead like last November? What is this, Madden?), but apparently the sneaky folks at Rock Paper Shotgun weren't surprised: they've already seen the game in action. We're hoping to see it this week ourselves, but until then, here's a few juicy zombie tidbits to hold you over: the game takes place in the Southern United States, and the five campaigns will take you on a Southern odyssey from Savannah to New Orleans. There are four new characters also: a rough high school coach who's used to taking charge, a female cable news reporter, a rustic Southern mechanic type, and a Sawyer-style con man. The characters keep the snappy dialogue, and the campaigns will tell an overarching story as you move through them.

"A spit-take is a comedic technique in which someone spits a beverage out of his or her mouth when he or she reacts to a statement during a take. In a spit-take, the reaction is usually one of surprise. Danny Thomas is sometimes credited with popularizing its use in comedy." (Source: Wikipedia, the lazy man's reference material.)

We thought it would be considerate to give you guys the ever-so-brief history of the knee-jerk reaction you're likely about to experience, depending on your level of self-investment in the overseas gaming electronics market, and whether or not you're currently drinking a nice, refreshing beverage. Amidst substantial drops in weekly sales totals for all its competitors, the rarely triumphant Xbox 360 pulled off a spectacular ascent with an increase of over 15,000 units. It performed this feat by riding upon the comfortable, pillowy back of Star Ocean: The Last Hope, a 360 exclusive that sold over 162,000 copies in its release week.

Then again, perhaps news that a Square Enix title featuring vaguely effeminate dudes pushed Japanese sales of its designated system doesn't surprise you to the point of expectoration. Your unflappable, steely nerves keep you from being startled by sales figures, let alone the GIANT SPIDER THAT'S ON YOUR SHOULDER. (Yeah, that probably did the trick.)

- DSi: 41,839 11,644 (21.77%)
- PSP: 29,552 4,704 (13.73%)
- Xbox 360: 25,334 15,501 (157.64%)
- Wii: 16,973 4,043 (19.24%)
- PS3: 16,149 2,507 (13.44%)
- DS Lite: 9,975 4,835 (32.65%)
- PS2: 5,029 303 (5.68%)

[Source: Media Create]

See: The expectorating archives

In Raven Software's latest FPS, Singularity, you play as a salesperson for Cingular Wireless, now AT&T Wireless. No, that's not right. Oh yes. You play as a character who, unlike a Cingular salesperson, can manipulate time -- travel through it, use it to make folks age to death ... y'know, the usual.

Anyway, the game's publisher, Activision, has released the first trailer for it and a couple dozen screenshots. The game looks mighty good, but we won't be totally convinced until we confirm players can use time to grow beards quickly. That and play it at E3. The trailer's hanging out just after the break or skip the lame Flash-vid and download it in glorious HD from Big Download.

Many of Liberty City's proxy residents who'd returned to the crime-riddled metropolis following the release of The Lost and Damned were recently perplexed by what appeared to be some random acts of censorship that tagged along with the expansion -- certain European versions of GTA IV suddenly lacked the game's most NSFW elements. Namely, bullet infused corpses no longer spilled excessive pools of blood, and when in the company of a paid escort, camera control was stripped of the player while said escort performed the services she was contracted to execute. (Hooker sex, people. We mean hooker sex.)

This censorship seemed an odd addendum to an expansion which unapologetically brought us a faceful of prong -- as it turns out, the censorship was indeed accidental. At least, that's the claim of Rockstar, who attribute the "error" to the game's latest title update. Why the changes were incorporated into the update in the first place, or why only certain copies of the game were affected is still a mystery, but Rockstar is hoping to release a quick de-censoring patch "within the next few hours."

We've told you about it -- now see the new downloadable chapter of Prince of Persia, "Epilogue." As its title suggests, this new challenge is set after the game's controversial ending. It also sees the Prince gaining a new Sprint ability and his girlfriend, uh, "companion," Elika, given the power to (temporarily) restore patches of the level to their uncorrupted state.

Hitting XBLM and PSN on February 26, this adventure through the Underground Palace -- and confrontation with a new boss, the Shapeshifter -- promises to be more challenging than anything pre-Epilogue. Just watch and you'll see what we mean.